After waiting for the CT scan results to come through, the hours passed and time crinkled into a single moment. At the ENT's office I got the official word that the results were positive. Good news, it hadn't spread. Apparently the cancer is still flaring up on my tongue but is gone from my neck. I am about to undergo a procedure called a hemiglossectomy or excision of part of the tongue. This can include removal of half the tongue. Despite the treatment started back in December, 2007, the cancer became very aggressive, tricky and resistant to the chemotherapy and radiation therapies. This procedure is an attempt to isolate and remove the growth. Looks like the opera and competitive eating careers could be on hold.
So what advice can I offer to others who are facing a medical event like this? The best and most sane advice I can give is to be at peace with the decision, don't resist by putting an added story to the fact. Don't create anxiety, but create a space for healing around the event. What will be got to be as Bob Marley stated. Is cancer or any disease the real you? Is the definition of your body the real you? Hint: The real you is not the body, nor the disease. Contemplating these questions will involve a lot of searching. For every individual, this is going to be different. believe me, having an internal positivity toward any situation is going to help it along. There is less chance for resistance, both internal and external that can snag on the path. Fair, unfair, anger, pity, tears will not change what has to be, neither will a false sense of bravery or toughness. My focus is on the healing, not the labels put on the condition or the variables surrounding it. It is part of my experience on this planet. Good? Bad? It just is. Up to me to find that as useful and welcome on the journey. I am surrendering resistance and welcoming wellness, peace and healing. At some point, I'll eat a plate of hot barbecue wings in your honor!
Needless to say, the blog will be coasting for a week, but will be back on track soon.
One Love
Wednesday, July 2, 2008
Creating Space for Healing
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CT scan
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