Just Radiant—Undergoing Radiation Treatment

March was the first full week of 6 + main and 2 weeks booster radiation treatments for my head and neck cancer. This is an external radiation treatment, some are internal using 'seed's implanted next to various organs or tumor areas in the body. Radiation facts are important to factor into your treatment.

What can someone expect from radiation treatment? Well, for one, it helps not to be claustrophobic, anxious or timid about getting in there and getting it done. CancerCompass has the 3 types of basic treatments outlined.

The claustrophobic part comes from getting measured for a special mask that is used to precisely tailor the radiation to the treatment area of your head or neck. If you are claustrophobic let your doctor/specialist and the radiology technicians know before this portion of your treatment begins. It's better to deal with it and get started as quickly as possible. A little discomfort shouldn't prolong the radiation treatment for your head and neck cancer. The combination of chemotherapy and radiation in combination is sometimes prescribed to shrink and eliminate any cancer tumors.

The mask starts out as a flat special plastic sheet that when heated under hot water, conforms to your face. This is kind of like having a hot towel placed over your face, then pressed on until you almost feel the first layer of skin burning. The nurse technicians are very careful not to let you get too uncomfortable. You get a soft plastic mouth protection device which like the kind athletes use to protect their teeth. This is used because the mask and clamping puts a lot of pressure on the jaws. The mask is extremely tight. It also keeps your jaws and mouth in the right position for treatment. The mask has 4 or more clamps that align to the treatment table so you can be placed in the exact position each time. Your head is clamped to the table and you are not able to move. The radiotherapy machine is moved into position around you for treatment. This helps to concentrate the radiation on your specific head and neck area. Additional measurements and film are taken at regular intervals (usually every third treatment) to ensure you are getting the precise beam alignment on your body.

The main series of radiation treatments will focus on one or more fields that segment the cancerous areas in a methodical approach to reducing them. After the main series comes a 'booster' series (if requested by the attending Oncologist) that are reduced fields and reduced radiation. This ostensibly prevents any future cancer from recurring in those treated areas. This ostensibly prevents any future cancer from recurring in those treated areas. Getting nutrition by mouth may become a problem. I opted to get a PEG tube in my stomach to get nutrition throughout my treatment.

There are some harsh side effects form the radiation. Of course, every person's treatment will vary as well as the side effects. In the case of my base of tongue and lymph node cancer, the biggest detriment to joy was the continual mucositis which is really rough. The radiation dries up salivary glands which leads to dry mouth, a 'stone' lodged in the throat (tightness and sandpaper-like feelings along with a Sahara dryness that makes you choke). Also, if you've ever had strep throat, multiply that by 5 times and you get the general idea of how sore your throat can become. The irritation and inflammation alone are crazy, combined with the torrent of phlegm caused by the radiation is enough to make a person want to quit on the stool. The important thing is to keep going. Quitting will only ensure your cancer will still be there. Keep pushing through the treatment and things will eventually get better. The redness on the exterior of my neck and jaws were kind of like a 1st degree burn. The radiation filed on one side of the neck often seeks an exit point. So little splotches of bright red appeared on my neck. You also lose the hair on the treatment area. Sometimes it grows back, sometimes not. Another side effect in my case was that my taste buds went buh-bye. Yep, everything tasted like wet, slimy cardboard. They say it comes back, but at a rate of one month for every week of radiation.

This is some harsh stuff, but your life is in the balance. Go through it and your loved ones and family will be forever thankful. You have to prepare for battle in dealing with your cancer treatment. You have to find the will to fight. You can do it!

A Private War: Ready Like a Soldier

Through most of this battle with cancer, the main focus has been to hang onto and grow the creative part of my life as a graphic artist and electronic musician. Each day I come to the computer or the keyboard is another day that I get to to go up against the biggest threat to my life and my purpose. Everyday I can put in even a few moments of creative time, is a chance to be embrace life. On days when it is physically impossible to be up and around, I envision a creative project like what I will do to make a beat, or design a graphic. Like a terrorist strike, cancer invades and threatens every aspect of what is your essential self. Like a soldier, you have to meet the threat, contain it, and destroy the invasion for good.

In these series of brutal battles fought on the landscape of my mortal coil, I had overwhelming support from my family and friends. Sure, there were the fair-weather friends who decided it wasn't convenient to interact with me anymore. Maybe I wasn't too much fun, ya know? But the strategic support my loved ones provided armed me for the conflict. As the days merged into weeks, then months, the unfailing support and love keep coming. While I am most decidedly not the same person I was 6 months ago, I have gained a new appreciation for life and for the pure joy of being alive and being thankful. Get up, go out to engage the threat and beat it back each and everyday. Gather resources for your fight – knowledge is critical.

Just one thing though — sometimes the soldier is cut off from his company and must fight completely independent and away from support. No one can hold your hand 24 hours a day. In essence battling cancer is a private war. You are invaded by the cancer and it is a life changing invasion. You will or will emerge victorious based on a number of physical and mental factors. No one can win this private war in some of the mental battlefields it will be fought in. You are the only one who can face these hand to hand fights as they come. Faced with being taken off the planet can do wonders for being skittish before the big battle.

The various physical challenges and side effects faced each day must be brought into the big picture of survival. Sure, your chemotherapy is making you sick, your hair is falling out, your weight is plummeting, you're not able to work, your daily routines shredded. Sometimes it is an hourly struggle to face the side effects of the cancer drugs and a daily cross to bear. This is the private war, this is where the war will be won. Only you can summon what it takes to defeat the negative mental state this disease brings. Your family and loved ones can give you all the support in the world, but you have to face this fight in a lot of little ways on your own. If you are not ready to do this, if you are not ready to command yourself on the battlefield, you better learn fast.

Each day you handle some detail of your battle, www.cancer.org your treatment and recovery, you are winning. Not only do you give yourself an edge, you brighten the spirits of those around you. You can't learn to be fearless from anyone but yourself. Sometimes, you have to go into battle with fear, just get up and go. Survivorship is the goal in your private war. You will come out on the other side and have a new appreciation for living and those you love. Until then, be ready like a soldier.